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What's in a Name? There's so Much in a Name / Car and Country

What’s in a name?

There’s so much in a name.

 A Car with a nice name is so important and only America understands that.  They are so imaginative. Italian names are tongue twisters except the romantic “Alpha Romeo”.

 Mercedes is most unimaginative with silly initials or digits that differentiate one model from the other.  They are all Mercedes but 200, 220, 230, 270, 350, 500 etc or SL SEL, SLC or C class or E class, utterly meaningless.

 Most world famous cars wear the surname of their inventors like Harry Ford or Mr. Toyota or Ferdinand Porsche or Henry Rolls and Charles Royce.

 Now, let’s get into America.  The names of their cars are like poetry in motion. 

 Starting with the Chevrolet range, Bel Air, Mercury, Monte Carlo, Impala, Biscane, Malibu, Camaro, Corvette, Caprice.

 Ford – Thunder bird, Mustang Granada

 Cadillac – Fleetwood, De Ville, Seville, Brougham, Eldorado.

 Chrysler – New Yorker, Le Baron, New Port, Cordoba, Town and Country.

 Pontiac – Firebird, Phoenix, Grand Le Marc, Catalina, Bonneville.

 Stutz – Bearcat, Black Hawk, Royale.

 Even BMW again like Mercedes is just initials and digits.

 English car names have some resonance in them like – Triumph, Jaguar, Austin and Morris are such insipid names again.

 Buick has beautiful names like Buick Wildcat, Sky hawk, Skylark, Buick Century, Buick Regal, Le Saber, Electra, Rivera.

 The poor little Maruti sounds like chappati.  Does’nt it.

Car and Country

Once you are familiar with the tell tale hints you can immediately guess where a car is made in.

Peoples mannerism, taste, standard of living, standard of expectations, degree of dignity, generosity, methods, imagination, moods and temperament all get fused into the automobile they manufacture.

British Cars

They will be dignified looking and always wear a serious look.  The interior will be very neat but not loud or overly luscious, the colours very bland. The very high league cars like the Rolls Royce, Jaguar, Aston Martin, Bentley, Ackley, Daimler, and Panther all have a heavy look stately but unfriendly looking.  Almost as if each times you have to seek permission of the car before riding in it.  So what if you are the owner. Even the Range Rover is a jumbo of an SUV.

Then there are the strings of cars for commoners like Austin, Vauschall, Ford, Triumph, Morris, Talbot, MG, which are completely utilitarian with no fuss or frills.  No splurge on chrome or velvet.

The cars are like their country-men.  Just as English men are.  Very reserved and aloof but grace personified once you know them.

Italian Cars

Silky sleek lines but no bulk whatsoever as if they are on a permanent diet.  Roary and aggressive by volume and nature.  They are shrewd movers and signal breakers like the men of Italy.  Now you see them now you don’t.  Interestingly, Italy doesn’t make a single luxury car or limousine.  They are all cramped with abnormal output of power.  The fastest and most agile cars. Italians have no use for the rear view mirror because they are just not interested in what’s going on behind.  Very few family cars like FIAT, Larcia, and GIANMNI. The rest are all speed monsters Ferrari, Maserati, Alfa Romeo, all with a motto win or die nothing in between.

German Cars

Strong, robust, long lasting but even the fanciest names don’t provide you with very pampering luxury. As they are a hard working lot and don’t like to laze around. Not much stress on shape either.  The Volkswagen Beattle and Porsche Carrere look like the designer was an amphibian lover.  BMWs are very boxy and Mercedes, except some of the older ones are very mundane looking, grumpy but efficient.  Audi also has nothing distinctive except the Olympics like logo. Opel? listless.  The cars look like they have had their porridge and oatmeal regularly.

 Japanese Cars

These are like their soft-spoken, gentle manufacturers.  Silent, most controls operate by finger play.  The seats are soft like their skins. Toy like and some doll-like like their women.  The cars are not buxom just delicate and elegant.  There are little tweeters and musical alarms in doors, gears just as they keep humming with their walkmans.  The dickey pert like their ladies have.

Russian Cars

Most frugal utilitarian like most of the poor people there who believe let’s cut through life without making a song and dance of it.

Indian Cars

Hospitable like Indians all doors swing open wide and you can load in as many people.  The Ambassadors of yore used to look like over-weight North Indian women with big bosoms and large back-side and used to wobble like them too.  The standard Herald inspired by Triumph was short like the average Indian. Maruti has the typical Indian attitude – Ghar chota hai toa kya hua dil toe achha hai.

American Cars

Ooh la la la my absolute favourite. Versatile like the USA. Lavish like their pent houses.  Out candish colours, beefy bumpers like their burgers.  Forget about the country the car itself is a land of plenty.  Beautiful dashboards, lots of legroom, lots of booth space.  Large sofa like seats which sink you in and are your cradle of luxury while you commute.

Kaarl A.Gandhi

About the Author

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